Where is the closest monastery? While that probably isn’t the top Google search when moving to a new city, when I moved to Madison in 2009, that question was at the top of my list – right alongside practical questions like the nearest bank and grocery store. I had just begun exploring contemplative spirituality, and little did I know what a lifeline Holy Wisdom would soon become.
Shortly after moving, we began the long and stressful process of adopting our second child and I knew that I needed something deeper than my once a year “self care” retreat at the monastery. I began coming monthly on random Tuesdays when the monastery was typically quiet, allowing me the gift of eating with the sisters and engaging in my own personal time. One day, a summer sojourner at lunch mentioned the oblates. I had no idea what an oblate was, and up to that point I had attended only one centering prayer gathering and mostly kept to myself. Yet something about that conversation – and the brochure I picked up afterward – stirred within me. I decided to learn more.
Although I was in the thick of parenting young kids, I decided to say yes to the oblate formation year. Days before my first retreat, I was surprised (shocked) to discover that after many years of infertility I was pregnant. Having my year of formation coincide with my pregnancy deepened in me a desire for Holy Wisdom to become a special place not just for me, but for my family. My 2 young kids had no idea what a monastery was and I didn’t want them to think that their mom was going off to some mysteriously weird place, so I invited my family to join me for some meals. My children began having their own touchpoints from Chef Barbara Wright inviting them to cook, to Sister Joanne Kollasch offering them leftover pizza when she could tell the vegan option was not appealing to a 3 year old. The hospitality and kind people drew them in. When it was time to make my promise (accompanied with my newborn in the baby sling), my desire to embody Benedictine hospitality, in the same way I had received, was the foundation of that promise.
Meanwhile, during my formation year I was pastoring a small church – mostly young people in their 20s and early 30s – and whatever I was learning at my oblate retreats I would share with my church. I started leading retreats at Holy Wisdom to introduce contemplative practices. I was continually surprised by how many lifelong Madison-area residents had never even heard of the monastery. Almost without exception, they fell in love with it. Again and again, I was reminded what an extraordinary gift we have right in our own backyard.
Later, I became a certified spiritual guide and discovered another way to live out Benedictine values. At first, I hesitated to become a guide for retreatants. I was used to accompanying people over months or years, and I wondered how meaningful a single conversation could be. I soon discovered that even one conversation can become a sacred touchstone. To meet someone who may be visiting Holy Wisdom for the first time – perhaps experiencing spiritual guidance for the first time – and to hold space for them amid the beauty of this land, the quiet, and the prayer is a profound gift. Benedictine values naturally weave into those conversations, becoming another expression of the hospitality that first welcomed me. Over time, the land itself has become more than a beautiful backdrop; it has become an important piece of hospitality as well.
Each year, oblates are invited to reflect on the promises we have made. Each year, my answer remains “yes”. It is still yes because I know there are many people searching for what I was searching for years ago – a place of quiet, welcome, and renewal. I am thankful for that Google search years ago that led me to this sacred place and grateful that I now get to journey with others who may discover Holy Wisdom as a lifeline of their own.